Posts by Aunt Fancy

20

Disfellowshipping

by Legacy in

i wanted to know if anyone on here was df'd or know of any who were...why i ask is because many of the friends i have spoken to, say it's not done, just like that.

it's a process.

i have spoken to a re-instated sister and she said by the time they see you, you are pretty much out.

The stories I have heard about this cruel practice makes me angry at times and cry at other times. There is nothing easy about it and in some cases it is long and drawn out, it can destroy lives. It is pathetic the way it is viewed by some JW's. Many don't believe in the practice (I was one of them) and it tears them apart but I have seen many who are so heartless about it and they make cold comments.

One of the many reasons why I came out was being friends with a couple whose teenage daughter was disfellowshipped for a sex act not intercourse. The poor girl was put through an awful process and the questions she was asked were down right disgusting. They wanted to know what room of the house was she in, where did she take her cloths off, what exactly did she do and many more. It turns my stomach even thinking about it because they were all men in their 50's asking this young girl these questions. I could never look at them again with anything but distain for them.

There is nothing loving about this process like they try to make you believe. They say it is to keep the congregation clean but we know that is all bull sh*t! There are many in those congregations who live double lives and the ones in positions can be the ones who are the worst. If you are good at sneaking around and hiding then you can get away with a lot of stuff Including child abuse in many forms.

It is a cruel organization when it comes to how they treat ones they think are not following their rules. If your father or husband is a prominent elder then you will get a slap on the wrist but if you are just one of the rank and file you will not in most cases be treated the same. The elders kids can be some of the worst ones and they usually walk away.

Keep reading this site and others like it and you will hear the heartache this religion has caused thousands upon thousands of people. It is a tragedy and the public should know what really goes on behind those KH walls. It isn't like other mainstream religions at all because most of them you can walk away from and your life won't change but not this one, be prepared to lose every single person you were friends with and even your family.

33

Gran is dying.

by LouBelle in

jw
friends

my dear granny hasn't been feeling well for some time and has had a problem keeping anything down.

she had lost a lot of weight and gone for many tests.

those tests came back and on friday we were told she has cancer of the pancreas.

Aunt Fancy

LouBelle, I am so sorry to hear about your gran, I hope she doesn't suffer too much. My grandfather had that type of cancer too.

60

Hear Ye!!!Hear Ye!! WONDERFUL GOOD NEWS!!!!

by mouthy in

my jw daughter called me this afternoon!!!!!

!i am just over the moon.

her hubby not a jw has cancer & was operated on today!!!!.

Aunt Fancy

I am very happy for you and I hope it opens the way for you to have her back in your life.

217

Recording meeting

by Fading Begins in

first 30 min announcing a collection of bibles collected from r & f that is to go on display at bethel.

also accounts of how they "miraculously" received bibles that they didn't think they could get - eg.

geneva bible.. now - watchtower study review as there is no meeting tomorrow..

Aunt Fancy

Thanks Fading, I appreciate that you took the time to get us this info and wrote it all out.

21

I guess I was ashamed of the JW religion...

by Jim_TX in

jw
friends

when i was a kiddo growing up, i wasn't one of those that we all heard at assemblies giving their experiences... "here, let me show you the answer from the bible..." <reaching into their a** bringing out a bible>.

no, i would sit there in the audience, and think... that person has balls to do that.. when i went to grade school, i tried to keep as low of a profile as possible.

it was bad enough that i had to start the day by not saying the pledge of allegience like all the other school kids.

Aunt Fancy

My husband had a very simular upbringing as you with the exception he was outgoing and enjoyed everyone there. He felt like you did when it came to school and not being allowed to do the fun things. The football coach begged his mom to let him play but she wouldn't give in but she did allow him to get involved it track and little league. He did have some "worldly" friends he could hang out with. They were very poor too because his parents were divorced since he was 6. Music was important in his family so she did find him a guitar and let him take lessons.

He was treated very well by most of them but I think it was because his family was one of the original families in the city and his grandmother was one of the "anointed" and taught piano. He did have some great roll models that he is grateful to have one being Taze! He will admit that things are not the same now. The congregations did a lot more fun things together back then and the elders use to really take an interest in the youth.

I feel for all of the born ins because a lot of their childhood was robbed. I know how uncomfortable it is to be at work and there is a birthday cake, or the Christmas party or being some place and the Pledge is said or the national anthem is played, it was always so uncomfortable for me to not be able to do those things. The child does not make their own choice, they are forced to do these things and they honestly lose out of so many levels.

78

Why did you pick the name you have now

by label licker in

jw
friends

just wondering if your name describes what you saw, how you were treated when you were "in" or now "out", maybe your personality, ect.... i'm label licker and the why i picked this name was because of all the licking up one side of elders and down the other to either be an elder or ministerial servant.

one time i was standing right in front of this brother who wasn't made an ms yet and he totally ignored me and talked right over my head speaking really loud trying to catch the co's attention.. got sick of watching the poor elderly sitting all alone or standing against the wall like a wall flower with noone to talk to and yet all these label lickers would take turns picking up the elders elderly parents and take them shopping and do their groceries at least four times a week while out in service, yet, there was noone there to take a meal to a sister who just got out of the hospital with a heart attack.

when i had shown up at her apartment with a meal she asked if i could wash her private and change her bandages.

Aunt Fancy

I never saw this post before. I love jewelry, all things girly and always dressed up, one day my niece was about 4 years old at the time and she called me Aunt Fancy! Since this post was first started we have had so many new ones, I would love to hear how they chose their name.

46

I CAN'T TAK

by Caupon in

jw
friends

Aunt Fancy

Welcome Caupon, I am sorry you are going through this. I too would suggest reading Steve Hasson's books so you know how to talk to your mother. It has to be so difficult when you are very young to go through this. It really shows you how controlling the Witnesses are because you can't just walk away without being shunned. We are here whenever you need someone to talk to.

231

NEWBIES are leaving like crazy! Be very afraid WT

by clarity in

jw
friends

# 3 newbie post.

first of all, the newbies have set a record here!.

have you ever seen a 4pg post where 21 new members reply!

Aunt Fancy

Great post Clarity, it is exciting to see all of the new ones on the site. There are so many new ones that I am having a hard time keeping up with all of the new ones and their stories so forgive me if I forget. :) Welcome to all of you!

45

If anyone is interested in my 'Coming out' video on Youtube....

by Newly Enlightened in

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hx5mghrvbs.

Aunt Fancy

Kim, I am sorry to hear things have gotten more complicated. It really shows how inactive ones or ones brought up as a JW but never baptized are still indoctrinated. I think you did the right thing by not attending their kangaroo court and hearing false accusations. I feel the same way that if they were to come after us we would never go to a hearing.

You came out about the same time my husband and I did and also we are probably very close in age. Thank heavens we have some wonderful years ahead to enjoy. It is hard when you mostly had friends that were JW's but we are making some headway.

I enjoyed both of Shyla's and your video. It took a lot of courage to come out in the open.

22

I hate it that I have to lie so much to fade...

by ILoveTTATT in

jw
friends

i am feeling down... i feel trapped, and don't know what to do... just need to vent here i guess.... so my mom calls me today, and asks how i am doing.

"how are you doing spiritually?

" i respond... yeah, you know, the usuals... service, meeting, etc.... she tells me that she's doing a lot of service with my dad... i say, "great!"...

Aunt Fancy

I think it is wonderful that you are able to have an honest relationship with your Dad and I wouldn't do anything at this point to give him a reason not to trust you. I know you feel bad about not telling your Mom the truth but your Dad knows her much better and feels like it isn't the right time.

You would have to be prepared for her to shun you because that is the usual end result. My husband told his mom and even though she hasn't shunned him outright she doesn't call him anymore and when they get off the phone they use to tell each other they loved each other and now she doesn't which has really hurt my husband.

You haven't been on this journey very long so just slow down and be patient. Use Steve Hanson's advice because I think you have read his book. Give it time and when you know your Dad sees the whole picture and he is totally out the two of you can work on your Mom.

We have been out 13 months and my husband and I have made all of our decisions very carefully and we never rushed into anything which I believed helped us. Time is on your side and from what I gather your parents are still fairly young so they could get out and have a great life ahead of them. We are in our late 50's and we are enjoying what life has to offer.

Hang in there!!